High Expectations and Happiness


alice in wonderland confused

Options...options...options

So when we plan things, we naturally have high expectations of how things are going to pan out. We expect the best, we think a little bit about the worst and overall we hope the finished experience will make us feel like a renewed person. In my instance it’s this big, big trip that I’m planning, but I’ve suddenly started to question my thoughts a little. :/ That happens though and it’s not necessairily a bad thing.

It occurred after I started doing a lot of reading about happiness, well-being and travel (of course!). I really thought I had it all sussed out, but reading other people’s opinions really does start to get you thinking differently (and I like that, I LOVE learning new things and questioning my beliefs with new ones). But the real ground-breaking moment was the other day when I read THE MINI-RETIREMENT MISCONCEPTION by Tina Su.

(FYI: I emplore you to read this if you’re thinking about travelling yourself because it’s so frank and ESSENTIAL advice in my opinion).

The paragraph that struck me so, was:

“While traveling can enrich your life experience and enhance your understandings of other cultures, it will not make you happier and cannot be the solution to your discontentment at home.”

I know that I’m running away from the things that are bothering me here, we all do it, we all crave escapism, but Tina says it all in the fact that ‘our mind likes problems’ – it does (the little bugger!). When all is quiet on the Western front, my mind goes into overdrive, and starts listing all the things I’m doing wrong or have failed on (nice eh?) and then naturally, I don’t feel so great afterwards. These issues are not going to suddenly be solved by new scenery, in fact the more thinking time you have, the more you’re going to over-process it all.

I’m not going to lie, I feel my travel-dream is tinged with a little uncertainty now, but it’s not going to stop me! No! No! That’s not who I am or what this blog is about my friends. I am here to show you and prove to you that any wish/dream/scheme you want to do – YOU CAN, if you make & mold decisions to set it all in motion. But (and I know you’re all clever-clogs anyway), you do have to do a lot of thinking and soul-searching when it comes to doing life-changing things.

If you don't like the road you're walking on...

Photo c/o ohmyoath.blogspot.com

It is great to figure these things out NOW rather than later. So as a result I’ve decided to go about making some changes for myself which will hopefully tackle my happiness now, before my escape in the future. Then when I get there I will know I’ve done everything I can to be that little bit more content. 🙂

Write a list of all the things that are bothering you (I know that may seem a bit self-confrontational but trust me it’s also theraputic) and then think of a way that this issue could be resolved (draw pictures – use multi-colour, scented pens). I admit we can’t go about fixing everything so it’s perfect, but there are definitely steps towards making stuff that little bit better. 😀

For example, I’m currently researching:

  • Courses
  • Internships
  • People I admire, to see what they are doing and how they did it

So you can see at the moment I am very much geared towards career-based research, because I know tackling that, is going to make me 10 x happier.

happinessdestination

THE TRUTH.

I’ll leave you with these words from Tina’s site thinksimplenow, which again resonated so much within me (she’s a little genius eh?):

  • “Happiness Is Here, Now – Regardless of what we’re doing, we can find happiness in this moment. The problem is, we often do not seek happiness in this moment, and then become consumed with reasons why we should escape this moment. Instead of focusing on why you’re not happy, ask yourself: what can I gain from this moment? What can I learn? What good can be drawn from this situation? Where is the goodness, where is the beauty?”

I think this is why research is so important, because it’s after reading something that you really start to re-evaluate. I wonder if I hadn’t have read Tina’s blog, maybe I wouldn’t have come to this conclusion so quickly. THE TIME IS NOW my friends!

Love & sunbeams Em xoxo

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About gohemians

I'm Emma, I'm 29 and I am a Gohemian. I am fueled by my passion to travel all over the world and to help others reach their dreamy, sparkly goals (no matter how scary they are). GohemianTravellers celebrates ambition, personal development and happiness and offers bucket loads of advice to travellers and quarter-life crisis survivors (just like me)! Life is all about the GoGo! So let's GO!
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3 Responses to High Expectations and Happiness

  1. rosie alpine says:

    Nicely put em!! Let me share a little quote I found about happiness the other day…..’Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you sit down quietly, may alight upon you.’…..don’t go out into the world hoping to find the answers to your life……live your journey and the answers will come to you XXXXXX

  2. Jurassica says:

    A very thought provoking, inspiring post… time to get behind the wheel… let the happiness begin!xoxo

  3. Tracey says:

    I’ve def felt this being at home now. Coming home was not something I was looking forward to but I switched that off in my head and found myself enjoying the beauty of the country air and the sounds of the crickets. I gained this appreciation from travelling, seeing things I never thought I would and then coming back to have an appreciation for the familiar and the small things I was missing while on the road. Dont get me wrong I can’t wait to get back out there! But I am so happy for the opportunity to get back to my roots! Very great post Em, it’s important to have the reminder that happiness is not an X on the map but rather how you view the map itself. LOVE LOVE LOVE x

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